Adult Baby Diaper Lovers
The Adult Baby Diaper Lover (ABDL) community is a diverse group of people that includes adult babies, diaper lovers, adult babies who are diaper lovers, and those who cherish them. ABDL can be sexual, non-sexual, individual, or partnered; it can be inseparable part of you, an identity, a lifestyle, a fetish, or simply fun.
The ABDL Spectrum
Since individuals in any group vary greatly in their preferences and activities, it is easier to imagine the ABDL community on a spectrum rather than as a single idea.
Some members of the ABDL community don’t wear diapers. Rather, their baby behaviors include speaking in a baby voice, drinking out of a baby bottle, or the desire to be taken care of by a “mommy” or “daddy.” Many participants use both role-play and baby items to express their ABDL desires and can do so alone, with a partner, or online. The desire to explore an infantile state and the use of baby items are common elements that accompany the comforts of the adult baby lifestyle.
Not everyone who wears a diaper identifies as an adult baby. Diaper lovers include people who wear diapers without a medical reason or enjoy watching others wear diapers, without the adult baby association. Many diaper lovers are especially interested in plush, soft diapers with a thick backsheet. Diaper loving can be sexual or non-sexual. Some diaper lovers enjoy secretly wearing a diaper in public, while others simply find safety or comfort in diapers without the desire to be a baby. Some diaper wearers identify as pre-potty trained littles and use their diapers accordingly.
Adult-Baby Diaper Lovers
And then there are some members of the community who combine both the roles and headspace of being an adult baby with the love of being in diapers. The use of diapers can enhance the role of caregiving and receiving care and love from their partner. The combination can also simply include two or more fetish items for sexual or non-sexual gratification.
For some ABDL participants, adult baby play is more about dominance and submission rather than baby role play. The Daddy Dominant and little girl or boy (DD/lg or DD/lb) dynamic or the Mommy Dominant and little boy or girl (MD/lb or MD/lg) dynamic are a few examples of how ABDL and BDSM intersect. Some ABDL members prefer the term “littles”, without “boy” or “girl”. The Parent-child relationship can be very important to both parties.
Some ABDL-identified people forsake sexual behaviors; after all, children do not have sex. Partnered ABDL activities for asexual people can give them an opportunity to connect with others and to negotiate their needs while still honoring their asexuality.
Misconceptions vs. Reality
There are many common misconceptions when it comes to the ABDL community, the most common of which is the idea that ABDL participants have a sexual interest in real infants or children. ABDL behavior has nothing to do with actual infants and is more closely related to being in an infantile state of mind that brings comfort or relieves stress. Age regression can be used as a coping strategy for negative mood states as the childlike behaviors generate positive sensations that counteract the negativity.
Another misconception is that ABDL community members are mentally ill. There is no scientific or medical evidence to support this idea.
What is the Take-Away?
ABDL and the ABDL community is another wonderful aspect of the human experience, something to be explored and indulged in, if that is your desire.
Online forums can be a safe space for ABDL members to connect with each other and to engage with a virtual community. They provide ABDL-related resources, events, and chats.
Whether you have an interest in or experience with ABDL and want to better understand this part of yourself or you want to work on an area of personal growth unrelated to your ABDL lifestyle or desires and are looking for a therapist who is accepting and understanding, we are here to help.
Are you looking for ABDL resources? We have provided a list to help you find what you need. Just click Read More
As with everything in life, there are ups and downs, and sometimes you need someone to talk to. Maybe your Mommy or Daddy isn’t paying enough attention to you. Maybe you have inner conflict, questions about how and where you fit in our kooky world. Perhaps you have wounds that aren’t healing or stories you need to tell. Or perhaps you just want to talk to someone about life and love, talk to someone who understands the challenges you sometimes face.
There is only one “you”, and we at Affirming Therapy Center are here to help you excel at living your best life and being your best “you”. Our therapists are trained to listen, understand, and help guide you on your unique journey.
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